I look up to the mountains.
​Where will I get help?
My help comes from God, who made heaven and earth, and who made me. He understands how strangely and wonderfully I am wired and loves me for just who I am, even when I do not get it right. He is the energy source, the lightning bolt of understanding, the Spirit who gives life and the ability to rise above all the hurts in this world.
I have seen his miracles! He protects me and those around me because He loves me. He can heal my marriage. He can save my child from depression and destruction. He gives me hope, that even in the darkest of days there is Someone bigger than all of this, able to make even bad things work out for the best. He gives me hope that after this life with all its agony and ecstasy, the best is still to come. 
It is this transcendent connection that is my greatest weapon against worry and stress, and if I do not tap into that power supply every day, I do not cope. I lose my sense of identity and purpose, and the comforting presence of the Spirit, but with Him I am a warrior, an overcomer, the liver of a full life. 
I look up to the mountains.
I know where my help comes from.
Ps 121

For me, nothing beats the freedom of the open air. I love the crags and cliffs of the mountains of the Western Cape, and to be high up there far from human noise. I love the open horizon of the ocean and the taste of the salty air. Here in Canberra we have been blessed to live very close to Mulligans Flat Nature Reserve, where I've done more runs and walks and cycles than I could ever count. It is an easy escape from city life, cars and the big rush. I've encountered countless echidnas, shinglebacks and bearded dragons, bush wallabies, nesting kookaburras and interesting  mushrooms, and more often than not, no people. 
It had been raining for what seemed like months, the days were short and freezing. But today the sun is shining. Today I put on my running shoes and made my way toward the reserve, loving the warmth on my winter shoulders, the promising stillness in the air, and the rhythm of my shoes hitting the trail. Today the tension just melted away, leaving me refreshed and determined. 

​I've known for a long time that I don`t do well without enough sleep. I get irritable and cranky, frankly I tend toward depression. Thankfully I know this now and have learned to manage it. Of course in high-stress phases it is much harder, and also if you tend to be a serious night owl who are much better at working late into the night than getting up in the morning.

It`s interesting how the most satisfying, worth- while and memorable times are those that require massive amounts of our time, energy and late nights. Like being in the army, like having a baby, and like studying.

So what a relief when an `independent study` day this week allowed me to work from home! I could sleep two hours later, the exact two hours I would usually spend on the bus, and work in my PJ's until 12. And the unusually late winter weather made it especially cozy and satisfying! I also got more work done than I would have at school, making it an productive and reassuring day. The best stress-buster is of course not only sleep but mainly to do the work!

I know it`s mostly not possible to sleep in, as a matter of fact I have done more all-nighters this year than ever before (or maybe army might win with a hair width here). But new research is showing more benefits to sleep than we may ever have known, and I am shifting from regarding it as a waste of time to a treasured opportunity for recovery and reboot.

One day, when my kids are grown and I`m a student no longer, I`ll follow my natural inclination to paint until 3am and sleep until 10, but for now, a good, standard sleep routine is a sanity-saving grace.

It's interesting how much energy is released when one decides to 'seize the day' more deliberately for a while.  It is as if opportunities pop up from all around, and you see the world through a clearer, more appreciative lens. It's interesting too how content we become with the assumption that there will be a tomorrow. And how dull our lives can become all by our own choice. I do not wish to get a death sentence to start living fully, I do not want to wait until the circumstances are perfect, I want to enjoy my life right through the choices that I make, and also through the unplanned events that life hands out. We are so blessed to have options, to be able to travel and choose our jobs and raise our kids outside of the desperation that the biggest part of the world call home. Maybe we need to see real poverty before we realise how fortunate we are. Often we actually have to loose something to really appreciate it. Or we can just start looking at the world with new eyes, and seek out the adventures and opportunities hiding in profusion in the mundane everyday routine.

Anyone will tell you of course that exercise and fresh air is important for stress relief, so it was natural to think about taking a walk. How and when and with who also plays important roles in this activity, but without planning too much (which can often result in terminating an idea altogether!), I decided a lunchtime walk along the scenic shores of Lake Burley Griffin is a must-do. Our school is close by and we should have done this much more often. I love taking new roads, routes and paths. It is like a mini holiday for me, an adventure of discovery and insight. Since doing another walk there a while ago, I decided to go a different way and walk a new, unknown route to get there, guided by my friend and walking partner for today, Jie-lian. How this changed my perceptions! I saw corners and places that I've been walking and driving past for years, but never realised that it was there. We skirted the recently closed Floriade grounds, with loads of flowers still as evidence of this major event, and with the warm summery smell of pine needles trapped among the trees.

There was a cold and almost gale-force wind blowing when we reached the lake, turning it into more of a sea, but we stayed mostly along the wind-off side and made a good brisk walk with the Carillon chiming out the quarters. Fresh air breathed deep into the lungs, blood rushing through our minds and limbs, sun on our faces and beautiful open scenery, with blue mountains as a backdrop...what a winning combination for stress-busting! 

Do you need to take a walk? 

When I got back from my recent study trip to Indonesia, my beloved other half got me a welcome back present of a leather flight helmet and goggles... a great bit of steampunk fun! I love it so much that I've been wearing it almost non-stop at home, it was really cozy and fluffy and particularly suitable for the freezing extension of winter we've been having. But wearing it out takes a bit more courage.

I have always loved dressing up, it feels like you can live all your imaginary lives or relive a happy childhood just by putting on a few pieces of strange clothing. I love such easy fixes. Or at least, it works for me! I don't need shoe shopping or a new mascara, just a browse through a costume shop would do it. 

This week I am wearing my flight helmet to school. I'm not waiting for an invite to do what I love, I'm not waiting for others to live their dreams. I'm not particularly interested in what people might think or say. I just like the instant feeling of brave I get when walking out the door in a strange hat. It might also be a gentle reminder that what you see is often not what you get, no matter how transparent you think you are. We are all much more than what we seem, we are too complex and multifaceted to be labelled and limited and judged. So wear your strange hats people! 

The end of this amazing year of full-time art studies is nearing its end. Although I am enjoying it immensely, a steady tension has been rising as our assignment pressures builds up steam toward the final projects. I am feeling slightly stressed (as in having heart flutters and recurrent, unresolved  dreams of projects and exhibitions, as artists do of course :) and have decided that this is no way to enjoy the last weeks here. I need a plan of action, a strategy, some marching orders to help break the fatigue and defuse the stress bomb that is threatening to cause serious damage, inhibit my intuition and ability to  discern and make important decisions (like weather should enroll in further studies next year...am I crazy?).

I have found few things as effective for relieving life's seriousness as changing the routine a bit. So I have decided that this week I will do things that I've been putting off, things that scare me, and things I won't be able to do after I leave here. I'll be ticking off lists and revive the joy and the enthusiasm we were meant to live with.

What would your seize the week look like? Let me know!

Seize the day, seize the week!
For art, for energy, for life.